The Art of Listening to your Child.

 

Being able to actively listen to your child is the utmost important skill that you can have in your parenting toolbox. Not many parents have the skill to "listen",  but with a little effort, they can develop it.  Listening is not an easy task, as a parent, you would be tempted to raise your voice and tell your child he is wrong. It takes s lot of patience to really hear them out. Read on to find out why it is important to listen to your child. and how you can practice to be a good listener.            

  How to improve listening skills                

There are a few small ways in which you can be a better parent with the help of actually hearing what your child has to say, rather than just listening. Children are fascinating creatures.  With time, you might even enjoy getting to know the world from their perspective. Always be present physically and mentally. Show curiosity and have an open mind. Along with this, you can also keep an eye on your child's body language and use nonverbal cues to understand him better,

Refrain from jumping to conclusions or forming an opinion while your child is talking. Do not hurry them. Let them continue the carry the conversation at their own pace. This helps in not only letting the child know that he is important but also lessens chances of time anxiety becoming an issue for the child. All listening requires patience, but this is specifically true for children.

A small tip is to repeat what they have to say. This lets them know that you have grasped their point, thereby letting them rest easy and secure in their bond with you. They are worthy of being both heard and understood . Remember, it is extremely important to let your child know that his views and opinions do matter.

Importance of listening to your child.

Bottling up their feelings does nobody any good. Least of all a child does not have the cognitive ability yet to be able to manage distress on their own. This is why children must be heard.  Author Robert Brault summed this up beautifully when he said, "A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to."

Without being aware of it, your day to day behavior affects your child in many ways, shaping their future personality. As parents, you influence your child's life intentionally or unintentionally.

From the tone of your voice to the words you choose, your child learns the skill necessary to interact with you, and through you, they learn how to interact with the world. According to Psychology, parents are essentially a child's first teacher. Children who are not heard, grow up to be insecure in themselves and their abilities. 

When you listen to your child, you get to know what they are feeling, thinking, and going through. Childhood is a difficult phase, and with a limited vocabulary, children often find it difficult to communicate their feelings.

To be a good parent, you need to look at the world from your child's perspective. You have to listen earnestly to what they have to say. Children are smarter than we give them credit for and can always feel when they are being ignored. The things your child wants to talk to you about may seem unimportant or small to you, but it is not so for him. If you don't listen to the little stuff. You won't be made privy to the big stuff. Because, as  Catherine Wallace said 

 "....to them all of it has always been big stuff ".